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| The biggest fart EVAR. |
| 04.30.06 (8:25 am) [edit] |
What's the longest amount of time, and the circumstances, that you've held a huge fart? Think about it, can you really remember? I can sure remember mine. Gosh, what an ordeal that was. My aunt and uncle used to live in Minnesota and we visited them a few times up there. On the flight home (which I think was at least 3 hours or more), this really cute sailor sat next to me. Dad had the window seat, I was in the middle, and the sailor was to my left in the aisle seat. He was so adorable, polite, and sweet. I think he was on leave to visit family in Florida or something. He'd been up all night on countless layovers and flights, so he was absolutely exhausted.Well, the plane took off and we were airborne - no problem. Then..... I felt this gigantic fart coming. I mean, it was HUGE. I wanted to get up and go to the restroom to let it "free", but I couldn't do so because the sailor was asleep next to me (he was almost falling onto my shoulder) and I couldn't bare to wake him up. And so, I held this fart all the way from Minneapolis to Fort Lauderdale Airport. It kept coming and going - you know how when you hold a fart for a while, it'll sort of go back in? Well it would do that, then it would come close to blowing again and I'd have a heckuva time holding it. I would have probably let it out if it were somebody else sitting there and not this cute sailor. Ah, but then again, no I wouldn't. I just knew it was going to be VERY loud. So we landed, and I thought "Oh, boy! I can get to a bathroom and let 'er rip!" But nooooo. We were in a hurry to get our luggage because a friend of Dad's was outside, waiting to drive us home. So then we had to wait for our luggage, and I'm turning blue with a fart. We finally get our bags and go outside (there was like a billion people out there, so I couldn't do it there. I would have if it didn't feel like it was gonna sound like a bomb going off), put our stuff in the friend's trunk, and he drives us home. It was a bit of a drive, so I had to hold it then too, being in closed quarters in the car and all. And I'm not comfortable enough around this guy to just fart. I'm not comfortable around him, period! So when we got home, I said to Dad's friend, "Gottagothanksforthe ride." and RAN into the house and into the bathroom. I then exploded. I've never felt such relief in my life. I was just laughing at the thought that I could be telling this story to my grandkids years from now. LOL.  |
posted by: aesav23 (reply)
post date: 04.30.06 (4:22 am)
NUCLEAR HOLOCAUST!!!
posted by: dustyjumpwings (reply)
post date: 04.30.06 (4:24 am)
Reply to: aesav23
I'm surprised the house is still standing. I definitely would have wrecked the airplane if I'd done it on board.
posted by: carrie eastmen (reply)
post date: 08.09.07 (6:38 pm)
yea i love to fart is just like when the sun comes out on a bright sunny summer day lol
hahhahhahaha peace 4 20 yea
posted by: big shit stan (reply)
post date: 08.09.07 (6:38 pm)
i poop my pants everyday..........
posted by: carrie eastmen (reply)
post date: 08.09.07 (6:40 pm)
aww, bloop
haha lol
posted by: big shit stan (reply)
post date: 08.09.07 (6:40 pm)
i poop my pants everyday..........
